But which one is Farrah Fawcet?

8:00am - Alarm 1 - Denial: "No WAY this alarm is going off already. I had literally just started playing cloud tag with my mom and the cast of three's company." SNOOZE.

8:11am - Alarm 2 - Anger: " I GET IT YOU'RE AN ALARM CLOCK. Are you shitting me? I will plaster of paris this screeching box-harpy and dropkick it into the god damn ocean." SNOOZE

8:22am - Alarm 3 - Bargaining: "I don't need to eat cereal, shower, brush my teeth or wear pants. I did all of that yesterday. Presto, 10 more minutes." SNOOZE

8:33am - Alarm 4 - Depression: "Oh God. I'm actually going to die from this. Is this throbbing in my head a tumor? Can you die from lack of sleep? What have I done? Why have I done this to myself?" SNOOZE

8:45am - Alarm 5 - Acceptance: "Ok the train leaves in 20 minutes, might be time to put on pants and do other things that make me culturally acceptable."

Needless to say, me and mornings don't get along. (I made the train as the doors were closing with no time to purchase a ticket).

Fast forward to more train adventure...

There's something consoling about enjoying a rice krispie treat at a Penn Station Starbucks while enduring the "wait of shame" that comes with missing your 11:00pm train. Surprisingly, there's a good amount of latemongers that couldn't get their ass out the door in time to make their train either. This Starbucks is feeling particularly shamey.

I'm tired. The kind of tired that can only be described as "entrepreneurially spent." I zoned out hard on the subway to Penn Station. I was locked in a deep, meditative concentration; a nirvana that had me completely staring off into space, before realizing after a solid three minutes that space was actually the plaid crotch of the all-too-clearly creeped out guy sitting across from me. Is there etiquette in that situation? Are you supposed to acknowledge that you were, for all he knows, just locked in a steadfast admiration of his plaid-clad twig and giggle-berries? What do you say?

"Looking good?" No...
 "How's it hangin?" *Wink* Eh...
"Sorry for staring directly at your penis." Well that's just brash.

I chose a different path. The one where I cough and give him a look like I was an insulted foreigner, who was hurt he didn't return the junk-stare that was a customary greeting amongst my Martian culture. It seemed to work, but how do you even gauge that? As long as he's not hammer-punching my clavicle in a fit of homophobic rage, we're good.

Today was an 8 hour grind that myself, Phil (my partner), and Joe (his Godsend of a cousin who's as diligent as he is creative and helpful) embarked upon in order to lock up some clients. It's pretty awesome, the only way I can put it is in Grand Theft Auto terms: you have these locations you have to go to within a certain time limit, meet this absolute wide cast of characters, and take on various missions for money. However, the scope of our jobs happen to diverge slightly from the charm of stealing a crime boss's helicopter and flying it into his wife and kids (your typical mission in Grand Theft Auto) to the more realistic (and far less munitions-reliant) Social Media Marketing initiative.

Our tour de queens was a six hour, five meeting gauntlet full of sales pitch after sales pitch, strategy presentations, and price negotiations with guys who have been in business for decades. They all pulled out their bib and wetnap when they saw these raw, 20-30 something business owners waltz through the door. I get off on it though. The perception of being a budding, young entrepreneur that has little clue as to how things work in business, then impressing them with how composed we are, prepared we are, and how professional our pitch is (and of course, there's always the sobering instances where you realize you're a budding, young entrepreneur that has little clue as to how things work in business which usually end in tears). Either way it's awesome. The mental chess of an interview, that is. The teamwork and brainstorming that come with a two and a half hour presentation pitch that can all go up in smoke with one wrong move in the close. It's entertaining, and the people you meet are always different and dynamic. It's like they're real people! Some highlights of the folks we've had today:

1. "DONNA! I'll meet with you in a second, right after the male version of Charlie's Angels gets out of my office."

2. "I'm going to share with you some business advice, as I will often do. Today your piece of advice is: never blow smoke up your clients ass. If you say you will deliver something, deliver it. If you can't do it. Say you can't do it. Stick to your guns. Don't devalue yourself. And don't let people poke holes in you. People will respect you more for telling them no to something then taking it on and failing, or worse, not completing it."

3. "I will bury this guy."

4. "If you get me to where I need to go, gentlemen, in four months we won't have to worry about a damn thing."

We also got our first taste of negotiating. I'm not talking "Oh hey, can I rape you on price? No? Ok. How about you rape me on price? No that won't work either" negotiations. I'm talking roll up the sleeves after a two hour pitch, lean back in your chair and go "let's talk numbers" negotiation. The kind of negotiation that comes at about the 55 minute mark of a Michael Douglas film and has about 10 back and forths before reaching an accord. With quote #2 above having been spoken to us an hour prior to this meeting, it was fresh in our head, and we performed admirably under fire. Myself and Phil stood our ground and spun most things he threw at us into reasons he should go with our pricing. It was a fantastic display of wits, between all of us, even Joe got involved in between scribbling down notes furiously. If it was a game of Connect Four, it would have been block after block. When it was all settled, though he definitely got a lot for a bargain, we held onto what could be a very large client for what still ends up being worth our while. Myself and Philip play well off each other, he playing the calm, calculated artistic visionary, and me the energetic, ambitious strategist it's good chemistry to pitch from.

Daily Stats

Total potential client visits for the day: 5

Total clients secured: 5

Total curbs struck with vehicle: 1

Total Asian families witnessing hardcore stoplight light jam session: 1

Total ounces of sweat: 4,987

Total protein platters eaten at Starbucks: 2

Tomorrow is back to the death-watch at the rapidly approaching ex-job. So begins my time transitioning into becoming a consultant, and in turn, prepping my department to transition with that.

Days left at the old job: 13

See you Space Cowboy.